12/13/2006 – Editorials

The bipartisan commission on Iraq gave its findings last week.

President Bush gave lip service to the recommendations, sounded conciliatory but rejected some recommendations outright. He will implement as few of the recommendations as he can get by with. But public opinion will eventually force even George W. Bush to face reality.

Bush gives lip service to "victory" in Iraq, but has never put enough military personnel on the ground to do the job. Unless he does that, the cause is lost and we might as well get out now before more needless deaths of US military personnel occur. The halfhearted military measures of the Bush Administration have proven to be textbook failures. Sen. John McCain advocates beefing up the military to get the job done. There’s no middle ground here. The US either has to do what McCain recommends or we have to get out. But I’m not optimistic because, sadly, George W. Bush isn’t smart enough to figure this out.

If we summarily pull out there will be a bloodbath as Sunnis and Shiites practice genocide. If we stay George W. Bush’s course there will still be a bloodbath with American military personnel caught in the middle. We have to either commit sufficient troops and resources or we get out.

Let me repeat that: We have to either commit sufficient troops and resources or we get out.

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President Bush said he was not going to accept recommendations to begin talks with Syria and Iran. His administration doesn’t talk with North Korea, either. Bush figures he’s punishing these rogue countries by not talking to them. I imagine they’re just devastated because Bush won’t talk to them. Wasn’t it Winston Churchill who said "It is better to jaw-jaw than to war-war?"

Bush’s idea of diplomacy is to have his adversaries give him everything he wants, "and then we’ll talk," as though US talks with other nations is some kind of great reward. This is only one example of administration incompetence in international affairs. It’s no wonder Bush’s foreign policy is in shambles and the US is hated around the world.

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There was a man who worked for the post office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses.

One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read:

Dear God,

I am an 83-year-old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday, someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension check.

Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope.

Can you please help me?

Sincerely,

Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman.

The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.

Christmas came and went.

A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to God.

All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read:

Dear God,

How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those bastards at the post office.

Edna

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A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a Minnesota Vikings jersey and helmet. The bartender says, "Hey! No pets are allowed! You’ll have to leave."

The guy begs him, "Look, I’m desperate! We’re both big fans, the TV’s broken at home, and this is the only place around where we can see the game."

After securing a promise that the dog will behave, and warning him that he and the dog will be thrown out if there’s any trouble, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game.

The big game begins with the Vikings receiving the kickoff. They march down field, get stopped at the 30, and kick a field goal.

Suddenly, the dog jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and down the bar giving high-fives to everyone. The bartender says, "Wow, that’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen! What does the dog do if they score a touchdown?"

The owner replies, "I don’t know, I’ve only had him for three years."