8/16/2006 – Editorials

This came by e-mail. It’s an old one, but interesting and informative, but I don’t vouch for its total accuracy.

WATER OR COKE?

We all know that water is important but this may be the first time you’ve seen it written down like this.

WATER

1. 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated.

2. In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechanism is so weak that it is often mistaken for hunger.

3. Even MILD dehydration will slow down one’s metabolism as much as 3%.

4. One glass of water will shut down midnight hunger pains for almost 100% of the dieters studied in a University of Washington study.

5. Lack of water is the number one trigger of daytime fatigue.

6. Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water a day could significantly ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of sufferers.

7. A mere 2% drop in body water can trigger fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math and difficulty focusing on the computer screen or on a printed page.

8. Drinking 5 glasses of water daily decreases the risk of colon cancer by 45%, plus it can slash the risk of breast cancer by 79% and one is 50% less likely to develop bladder cancer.

And now for the properties of COKE

1. In many states (in the USA) the highway patrol carries two gallons of Coke in the trunk to remove blood from the highway after a car accident.

2. You can put a T-bone steak in a bowl of Coke and it will be gone in two days.

3. To clean a toilet, pour a can of Coca-Cola into the toilet bowl and let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid in Coke removes stains from vitreous china.

4. To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers, rub the bumper with a crumpled-up piece of aluminum foil dipped in Coca-Cola.

5. To clean corrosion from car battery terminals, pour a can of Coca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion.

6. To loosen a rusted bolt, apply a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola to the rusted bolt for several minutes.

7. To bake a moist ham, empty a can of Coca-Cola into the baking pan, wrap the ham in aluminum foil and bake. Thirty minutes before the ham is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the Coke for a sumptuous brown gravy.

8. To remove grease from clothes, empty a can of Coke into a load of greasy clothes, add detergent and run through a regular cycle. The Coca-Cola will help loosen grease stains.

9. Coke will also clean road haze from your windshield.

For your information:

1. The active ingredient in Coke is phosphoric acid. Its pH is 2.8.

It will dissolve a nail in about four days. Phosphoric acid also leaches calcium from bones and is a major contributor to the rising increase in osteoporosis.

2. To carry Coca-Cola syrup (the concentrate) the commercial truck must use the hazardous material place cards reserved for highly corrosive materials.

3. The distributors of Coke have been using it to clean the engines of their trucks for about 20 years!

Now the question is, would you like a Coke or a glass of water?

—000—

We had a meltdown at the Farmers Press last week. Somehow our bookkeeping program became corrupted. The program backs up to another computer once a week and before we realized we had a corrupted file, the corrupted file was backed up over the previous week’s good file.

That left us with a program and a backup that dated back to 2003. But it dropped all items from 2004, 2005 and 2006.

Fortunately, we have a paper copy of most everything that was lost, but we’ll have to re-enter those items we want to keep by retyping them. We’ll be starting on that this week on a new computer with a new program. I don’t trust the old computer and program any more.

—000—

A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a talking centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for his house. He took the box home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to church with him.

So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to church with me today? We’ll have a good time."

But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to church with me and receiving blessings?"

But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. He decided to ask him one more time, this time putting his face up against the centipede’s house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to church with me and learn about the Lord!?"

A little voice came out of the box . . . "I heard you the first time!

I’m putting on my shoes."